“What am I in the eyes of most people — a nonentity, an eccentric, or an unpleasant person — somebody who has no position in society and will never have; in short, the lowest of the low. All right, then — even if that were absolutely true, then I should one day like to show by my work what such an eccentric, such a nobody, has in his heart." - Vincent Van Gogh
My "dream" is to become an Artist, of acceptable skill/level, of acceptable ability in being able to portray skillfull and well done illustrations and paintings. Art is my Road to Damascus.
In this bloody struggle, if i succeed, My Hope and Goal is to inspire others that achieving their dream is possible if even a subhuman failure as myself manages to succeed. If i fail, i will accept Nothing but Oblivion.
(Any lack of "activity" or uploading is because i am trying to do what i can to study from books/tutorials/practice, etc daily and would prefer not to upload further waste until i have done something (or reached the skill) of being atleast presentable)
It is an ever apparent fact that for some, achieving one's dream is impossible. Each person is entitled to the right to choose how to live or end their life as they see fit, for whatever reason they decide. It is an undeniable fact that death is more honorable and sensible than the humiliation, stagnancy, defeat, and pointlessness of failure or suffering.
"A subhuman pathetic coward tolerates or accepts a life of failure in suffering or stagnancy, A decent person chooses death" - P.S.S
My two personal most admired/favorite Art "styles" are- [Manga] and [Environment design/Character design/Concepts] [I admire both traditional and digital media]
I desperately desire to get into Entertainment design- (Environment/Character design), but i'm unlikely to be able to afford to attend any such school or online course, and likely lack the "skill" required to be allowed in even the most beginning of training or classes.
---I'm the worst and most pathetic "Artist" to have ever existed
---Think you're bad at/incapable of drawing/art? Don't worry, I'm worse.
---The Inability to improve debilitating, The result of artistic attempts humiliating, The admiration of others work decimating.
---Some writers and artists create other worlds in their work because they are disgusted by the one that they live in.
“A man sometimes devotes his life to a desire which he is not sure will ever be fulfilled. Those who laugh at this folly are, after all, no more than mere spectators of life" - Ryunosuke Akutagawa
“I could wish for nothing more than to die for a childish dream in which I truly believed" - Ryunosuke Akutagawa
"I try to be genuinely cheerful, but my life is all so threatened at the very root, and my steps are wavering" - Vincent van gogh
“I put my heart and my soul into my work, and have lost my mind in the process.” - Vincent Van Gogh
"Suicide is the sincerest form of self-criticism" - Donald Kaul
"Death before Dishonor" - ?
"It is better to die on your feet than to live on your knees" - Emiliano Zapata
"I would give the world to embody one half the ideas afloat in my imagination" - Edgar Allan Poe
Advocate of Anti-Psychiatry (among other things as well) and am strictly against the labeling or deeming of anyone as "mentally ill". People have a right to their own mind and body. "Psychiatry" is an Atrocity. "Mental illness" Does not exist and is nothing but a pathetic mythical excuse to discriminate against someone for being different. Involuntarily holding someone against their will who has not committed any Actual crime is disgusting and pathetic.
Anyone who believes in "Psychiatry" "Psychology" or "Mental illness" is a disgusting worthless pathetic Subhuman bigot.
Advocate of Anti-Psychology
Advocate of Pro Suicide.
Advocate of the Right to die belief for all individuals.