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About Varied / Artist Member SuicidalArtist00020/Male/Unknown Recent Activity
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SuicidalArtist000

Artist | Varied
“What am I in the eyes of most people — a nonentity, an eccentric, or an unpleasant person — somebody who has no position in society and will never have; in short, the lowest of the low. All right, then — even if that were absolutely true, then I should one day like to show by my work what such an eccentric, such a nobody, has in his heart." - Vincent Van Gogh
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My "dream" is to become a Concept Artist(and manga art to a lesser extent), to be able to portray illustrations and paintings of an at-least acceptable/recognizable skill/level. Works of such level/skill that will invoke hope in those that come after me (if i succeed) that they can do the same. Art is my Road to Damascus.

In this bloody struggle, if i succeed, My Hope and Goal is to inspire others that achieving their dream is possible, if even a subhuman failure as myself manages to succeed, to give the hope to others that i myself have lacked. I am committed to showing that anyone can achieve their dream and desired level of skill in their chosen passion, and to show what our imagination is capable of. If i fail, it would appear i was wrong, everything i will have so desperately tried to work for and achieve will have been for nothing, and i will accept Nothing but Oblivion for my pathetic failure.
“Success or Death” - ?
"Death before Dishonor" - ?
"Victory or Death" - ?
"Do or die" - ?
"To the bitter end" - ?
"It is better to die on your feet than to live on your knees" - Emiliano Zapata

Any lack of "activity" or lapses of time between uploading i sincerely apologize for, it is not because i "forgot/stopped" or anything of the sort. It is because everyday for an amount of time i devote/commit to/study from books/tutorials/practice, and any free/or reasonably affordable resource i can get my hands on every day whenever i have time and i prefer not to upload significant amounts of trash until things become presentable or acceptably developed.

I am unlikely to find a way to afford any of these courses/training that teach good/decent illustration/painting skills as i am not so lucky and privileged as so many others apparently are, so i am left to struggle in "self-taught" efforts and flounder about in the dirt of pointless suffering and death validating mediocrity. I desire to get into Entertainment design training/classes- (Environments+Character design/Concept Art), but even then if it didn't result in a employed profession- i just wanted to reach a acceptable level of skill/ability in concept art illustration/painting in my personal work itself. Whether it is self taught or through educated training does not matter to me, i only wish to get to an acceptable level of skill in my own work regardless of whether it is through personal discipline/study or through education/training.

It is an ever apparent fact that for some, achieving one's dream is impossible. Each person is entitled to the right to choose how to live or end their life as they see fit, for whatever reason they decide. It is an undeniable fact that death is more honorable and sensible than the humiliation, defeat, stagnancy, suffering and pointlessness of failure and mediocrity.

"A subhuman pathetic coward tolerates or accepts a life of mediocrity/failure in suffering or stagnancy, A decent person chooses death" - P.S.C
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Favorite/Admired styles/Desperately trying to learn: [Environment design] [Character Design] [Concept Art] ([Manga]
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---The Inability to improve debilitating, The result of artistic attempts humiliating, The admiration of others work decimating.
---Some writers and artists create other worlds in their work because they are disgusted by the one that they live in.
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“A man sometimes devotes his life to a desire which he is not sure will ever be fulfilled. Those who laugh at this folly are, after all, no more than mere spectators of life" - Ryunosuke Akutagawa
“I could wish for nothing more than to die for a childish dream in which I truly believed" - Ryunosuke Akutagawa
"I have offended God and mankind because my work didn't reach the quality it should have." - Leonardo da Vinci
"I try to be genuinely cheerful, but my life is all so threatened at the very root, and my steps are wavering" - Vincent van gogh
“I put my heart and my soul into my work, and have lost my mind in the process.” - Vincent Van Gogh
"Suicide is the sincerest form of self-criticism" - Donald Kaul
"Without dreams we are nothing, We might as well be dead" - ?
"I would give the world to embody one half the ideas afloat in my imagination" - Edgar Allan Poe
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Advocate of Anti-Psychiatry (among other things as well) and am strictly against the labeling or deeming of anyone as "mentally ill". People have a right to their own mind and body. "Psychiatry" is a Subhuman Atrocity. "Mental illness" Does not exist and is nothing but a pathetic mythical excuse used by bigots to discriminate against anyone they think of as "diseased" or when someone doesn't fit their control fetish guidelines of conformity and "not normal". Involuntarily detaining someone against their will under the guise of "treatment" is an atrocity, you don't get to identify others as "diseased".
Anyone who believes in "Psychiatry" "Psychology" or "Mental illness" is a disgusting worthless pathetic Subhuman bigot.
Advocate of Anti-Psychology
Advocate of Pro Suicide.
Advocate of the Right to die belief for all individuals.
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:iconpinnoko:
pinnoko Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
well I got called a scientologist for putting the picture that said they tell you depression hurt's but they won't tell you antidepressants kill. and I also put a description at the bottom 
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:iconsuicidalartist000:
SuicidalArtist000 Featured By Owner Mar 10, 2014   General Artist
Because their spoiled control fetish dictates they must scream with tears of rage/discrimination whenever someone disagrees with their bigoted practice.
I couldn't care less for "Scientology" but "psychiatry"/"mental illness" control fetish freaks still usually try to claim that i'm a scientologist as an excuse for their failing bigotry.
Scientology may try to hold aspects of Anti psychiatry, but they are two different things, and only whiny spoiled "psychiatry"/"mental health/illness" complainers try to associate the two as being the same.
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:iconpansejra:
pansejra Featured By Owner Jan 22, 2014  Student Traditional Artist
Thanx 4 the :+fav: :)
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:iconpintoro:
Pintoro Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2014
Thanks for the fave!
Reply
:icononamoonlitnight:
OnAMoonlitNight Featured By Owner Jan 8, 2014  Student Writer
Thank you for adding "Da Svidaniya" to your favorites, it means a lot. 
xx nos sunt infiniti et natum esse verum xx
[ we are infinite and born to be true ]
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:iconpop2810:
pop2810 Featured By Owner Oct 25, 2013  Student Digital Artist
Thanks for thr fav ;)
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:iconer49563:
er49563 Featured By Owner Aug 20, 2013  Student General Artist
we stand for a lot of the same things.  it doesn't matter if your skill has not reached it's full potential-- you already have your mind.  :)
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:icondominiqueduong:
DominiqueDuong Featured By Owner Jul 3, 2013  Student General Artist
Thanks for the fave!
Reply
:iconistonecloud:
iStoneCloud Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
No one starts out doing things perfectly. I looked through your art, and to me, it's not even bad. You have a unique style to what you do, and I like it.
If you love to draw, then draw, and never give up. I've had many times where I felt like giving up because I couldn't draw good enough like other people, but we have to realize that if we want to be good in our own eyes, we must strive to be that way.
If you feel like your drawings aren't good enough, work on them more, and never give up hope that one day you'll be as good as you want to be.
You can do anything your mind is set to do, so don't give up, and be strong. There are millions of artists that go through the same thing, and we all feel for you.
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:icongelonder:
Gelonder Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Your drawings aren't bad. They're rather decent. However, if you look at my gallery, you'll see I used to draw like shit as well. I got better, though. It just takes dedication and practice, and no matter what, no matter what no one says, you have to keep doing what you love, not for the fame or approval, but just the Joy of doing it.
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